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2022-02-16Существует легенда, что, если после приземления самолета не встать в проходе салона, можно улететь обратно.
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Теперь в Морфлот будут брать только не умеющих плавать: они намного лучше защищают свой корабль!
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Одну девочку в школе называли Крокодилом. Но не потому, что она была некрасивая, а потому, что один раз она затащила в реку оленя и сожрала его.
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Бесит фраза "Будь проще". Я тебе что, червь кольчатый?! Эволюция не для того нейронные связи в моём мозгу плела, простейшие вы мои.
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- Поиграем в тщетность бытия по телефону?
- Давай. Ты где? allanecdots.ru
- В депрессии и в шаге от алкоголизма.
- Ммм. А что на тебе?
- Ипотека, чувство вины и и груз прожитых лет.
- О, да. Продолжай. Я уже трогаю свой диплом филолога и грущу.
- Медленно сажусь в угол и, обхватив колени руками, думаю о том, что сделала со своей жизнью. Она никчемна и загублена мной.
- Я расплакался и закурил.
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Взрослый внук говорит доверительно деду:
- Так хочется, чтобы моя жена была красивой. И непременно умной. А еще, чтобы она была богатой! allanecdots.ru
- Это не так просто, внучек. Тебе придется жениться трижды.
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Чтобы узнать, хорошо ли человек зарабатывает, надо спрашивать не где он работает, а где он отдыхает.
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