Просто смешные анекдоты

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GergtРазные 2015-07-01

- Танечка, давай останемся друзьями?
- Нет, только свадьба. allanecdots.ru

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GergtРазные 2015-07-01

Ночью в пожарной части раздаётся телефонный звонок.
Женский голос: - Ко мне в общежитие в окно четвёртого этажа лезет мужчина. allanecdots.ru
Дежурный отвечает: - Звоните "02", в полицию, а не "01".
Женский голос: - Дураки, ему же лестница нужна!

Женский голос: - Дураки, ему же лестница нужна!" data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/47513/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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ВадимРазные 2015-07-01

Девушки! Прежде чем вступить с кем-нибудь в брак, сначала дайте вашему избраннику поработать на компьютере с медленным Интернетом, чтобы увидеть и понять, какой он на самом деле.

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

- Ты помнишь свой первый поцелуй?
- Я не помню даже первого мужа! allanecdots.ru

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

В ответ на просьбы юных читателей продолжить эпопею про Гарри Поттера, автор эпопеи Джоан Роулинг написала 8-ю и последнюю книгу "Гарри Поттер и гопники Бирюлево".

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Звонок на радио:
- Добрый день! allanecdots.ru
- Здравствуйте!
- Могли бы вы поставить песню "Искала" Земфиры?
- Из чего, простите, песню?

- Из чего, простите, песню? " data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/47489/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Спрашивает девица князя на пиру:
- А почему тебя называют "Ясно солнышко"? allanecdots.ru
Князь отвечает:
- Сейчас заканчиваем пир, удаляемся в палаты. Ясно, солнышко?

Князь отвечает:
- Сейчас заканчиваем пир, удаляемся в палаты. Ясно, солнышко? " data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/47487/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

- Вернулся из отпуска - и чувствую, что-то не так со мной... Пошел проверяться. Сходил к невропатологу - нервы в порядке. Сдал анализ крови - алкоголь в норме. Пошел в вендиспансер - венерических заболеваний нет... Ну полный облом! Как будто и не отдыхал!

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Двое в купе.
- Простите, куда вы едете? allanecdots.ru
- В Астрахань.
- А, если не секрет, что вас туда тянет?
- Электровоз.

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

- Девочка, ты отличница?
- Hет. allanecdots.ru
- Хоpошистка?
- Hет. Я yдовлетвоpительница.

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

Октябренок подходит к пионеру - важному таколму, серьезному. тот презрительно:
- Чего тебе мелочь? allanecdots.ru
- Скажите, а дедушка Ленин какал?
Пионер после минутного раздумья:
- Какал, конечно, но как-то честнее, добрее что ли...

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