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Vaserman_Druz`
2015-04-22И вскочил Иван-Царевич на коня, крикнул по-молодецки. Но тут же подбежали к нему какие-то люди и на землю сбросили. И правильно - куда ж без билета на карусель прёшься!
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В парикмахерской:
- Как именно вы хотите подстричься? allanecdots.ru
- Как-нибудь. Так можно?
- Конечно. Я из вежливости спросила.
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- Ужасное чудовище! Я пришёл сразиться с тобой и спасти прекрасную принцессу!
- Но это я и есть принцесса... allanecdots.ru
- М-да... Неловко вышло.
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Для того чтобы привлечь внимание официанта, гражданин Сидоров громко постучал пирожком по столу...
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Человек, проработавший охранником более пяти лет, может разгадывать сканворд одновременно двумя руками.
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Жена, уходя в магазин, сказала мужу:
- Будешь варить пельмени, кидай по-одному, чтобы не слиплись! allanecdots.ru
Когда вернулась, злой муж варил шестой пельмень...!
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Она: - Мужчина должен быть чуть красивее обезьяны!
Он: - Мужчина должен быть чуть красивее обезьяны, с которой живет! allanecdots.ru
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- Дорогая, мне так трудно найти нужные слова.
- Ничего, милый. Главное - чтобы нашлась нужная сумма. allanecdots.ru
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Жена должна слушаться своего мужа! Сказал «Иди на хер! » - тихонько встала, намарафетилась, и пошла…
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Если женщина будет выпивать в день шесть литров зеленого чая, то может прожить 120 лет!… А если женщина будет выпивать в день шесть бокалов вина, то проживет всего 60 лет… Но зато ооочень весело!
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Закидывался нарк на балконе седьмого этажа, и шлепнулся вниз. Встал, отряхивается. Тут подбегают люди.
- Что произошло? allanecdots.ru
- Та хрен его знает, сам только что подошел.
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