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2022-04-13Должна быть в женщине какая-то загадка. Скажем, проснулся утром. Смотришь... Кто такая?!
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У меня такой недосып, что порой мне кажется, что если я подскользнусь и упаду на улице, я не буду плакать или смеяться, я просто засну.
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Мне не понять парней, платящих "госпожам", чтобы те их унижали. Чувак, просто женись и неправильно складывай полотенце!
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Первая заповедь перфекциониста - прокрастинатора: "Лучше сделать хорошо, но никогда, чем кое-как и сегодня".
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Издержки профессии: полярник, космонавт, моряк и дальнобойщик, даже не подозревают, что женаты на одной и той же женщине.
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Казашки в отличие от девушек других национальностей ждут принца на вкусном коне!
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Иногда я использую слова, значений которых не знаю, чтобы люди видели, какой я эрегированный.
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Для людей, которые "Чо такой грустный? Расслабься!" в аду есть специальный котел. Там черти каждые пять минут спрашивают: "Чо так потеешь? Охладись малек!".
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На вопрос, кем ты хочешь быть, когда вырастешь, 5-летний мальчик ответил честно: "Холостяком, как дядя Толя". Многие удивлялись, но больше всех - жена дяди Толи.
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Жена - мужу:
- Дорогой, врач мне посоветовал путешествовать. Куда мы отправимся? allanecdots.ru
- К другому врачу.
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Женщина пришла в милицию.
- У меня пропал муж, его нет вот уже 4-й день. allanecdots.ru
- Пишите заявление.
Написала, подает, прочли.
- Что ему передать, если мы его найдем?
- Передайте в первую очередь, что мама не приедет...
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