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Юрий Николаевич
2016-06-15- Папа муж мне изменяет направо и налево, что делать?
- Спроси лучше у мамы, у нее в этих делах большой опыт. allanecdots.ru
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Да, Петр Алексеевич, все люди - божьи твари! Но Вы из них самая редкая.
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Если бы у меня были деньги, их бы у меня давно не было.
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- Я вот тут подумал - и у меня родилась мысль...
- А я не подумал - и у меня родилась дочь... allanecdots.ru
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- Как твой английский?
- Говорю со словарем. allanecdots.ru
- А с людьми не пробовал?
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- Пойду на море, только не знаю, какой купальник надевать - открытый или закрытый?
- Надень оба - вода холодная. allanecdots.ru
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Есть мечта? Иди к ней! Не получается идти к ней? Ползи к ней! Не можешь ползти к ней? Ляг и лежи в направлении мечты!
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- Дорогая, я опять не могу найти свой галстук! Куда ты снова передвинула шкаф?
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Прапорщик поставил курсантам задачу: побелить бытовую комнату. Курсанты комнату побелили, доложили о выполнении задачи. Прапорщик пришел принимать работу:
- А это что за черный силуэт на стене? allanecdots.ru
- Так это ж ваша тень, товарищ прапорщик.
- За уважение хвалю, но все равно побелить!
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У меня увели мужа. Поставила решётки на окна, сменила замок, сижу и думаю: “Господи, хоть бы не вернули!”
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-Алло, Колю можно?
- Пошел нахрен! allanecdots.ru
- А, когда вернется?
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