Просто смешные анекдоты

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2016-08-11

Выросло новое поколение девушек, умеющих успешно доить козлов.

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2016-08-11

Съезд учителей математики закончился дракой. Чего-то не поделили.

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-11

- Папа, мама, познакомьтесь, это мой новый парень Паша. Паша - праноед, вейпер и покемонер...
- А можно как-то вернуть предыдущего цыгана? allanecdots.ru

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-10

- Соседи не жалуются когда ты с перфоратором работаешь?
- Да не, я ночью, когда все спят. allanecdots.ru

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-10

Лето. Вечер. Автобусная остановка. Стоит мужик, в сетке большой арбуз держит. Рядом стоят девчонки лет 16-17. Хихи кают. И тут одна из них поворачивается к мужику и говорит:
- Дядя, угости арбузом! allanecdots.ru
Мужик не растерялся:
- Кусай!

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2016-08-10

Она: - Знаешь чего я хочу?
Он: - Всего! allanecdots.ru
Она: - Это во-первых…

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-09

В автобус заходит молодой парень и садится рядом с привлекательной молодой девушкой. Та принюхивается, морщится и наконец спрашивает:
- Молодой человек, чем это вы так надушились? allanecdots.ru
- Это одеколон "Семеро смелых".
- Надо же! А я бы, судя по запаху, сказала, что один из них чего-то сильно испугался.

- Надо же! А я бы, судя по запаху, сказала, что один из них чего-то сильно испугался." data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/68219/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-09

- Послушайте, Вы у меня пятый раз покупаете билеты, - говорит кассирша мужчине.
- Да, но там на входе в зал какая-то идиотка их все время рвет... allanecdots.ru

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-09

На выставке в Париже армянский коньяк с тремя звездами занял первое место, а пятизвездочный вообще не попал в призеры.
- Почему так вышло? - спросили армянских виноделов. allanecdots.ru
- Сами удивляемся! Из одной бочки наливали.

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-09

Любимый мне сегодня прочитал замечательные стихи:
"Как хорошо, когда покой и тишь. Никто не лезет в душу острым жалом. Как хорошо с тобой, когда ты спишь, свернувшись как змея под одеялом". allanecdots.ru
Эстет хренов.

Эстет хренов." data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/68207/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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КомбатРазные 2016-08-09

- Что-то ты, Люся, пополнела... А была такая конфетка!
- Была конфетка, а теперь я - торт! allanecdots.ru

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