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2018-02-09Видя пустой стакан, пессимист думает: "Всё выпили, гады!", а оптимист: "Ещё не наливали!"
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- Интересно, а как начинается новый тренд в моде?
- Сначала о нем начинают трындеть... allanecdots.ru
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- Дорогой, если я умру, обязательно женись. Хочу, чтобы и после моей смерти ты был счастлив.
- Что ты, дорогая. Я и так буду счастлив. allanecdots.ru
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Если у жены маленькая грудь, это ещё не гарантия, что у мужа будут маленькие рога.
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Зашел в метро, стоит девушка беременная, месяц 8-9. Милостыню просит. Жалко ее стало, уже года 3 тут стоит, никак родить не может.
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- У вас жаба феншуйская с монетками прикольная в офисе.
– Вообще-то это бухгалтер... allanecdots.ru
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- А как я тебя узнаю?
- Я буду в футболке с Малышевой. allanecdots.ru
- Я, наверное, не приду...
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- Я удивляюсь, раньше твой муж шлялся по кабакам, гулял, а теперь в 6 часов уже дома. Как тебе это удалось?
- Да просто. Когда он поздно приходил, я через дверь спрашивала: "Петя, это ты?" allanecdots.ru
- И всё? А в чём прикол?
- Прикол в том, что моего мужа зовут Коля.
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- И всё? А в чём прикол? - Прикол в том, что моего мужа зовут Коля." data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/78726/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3"> |
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- Подруга сказала, что нам надо поговорить о нашем будущем. Я полчаса распинался про телепортацию, лазеры и силовые поля. Как позже выяснилось, я не очень понял вопрос...
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Примета. Если вы встретили бабу с полными ведрами урана - это к обогащению.
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Зима не наступила, но при этом отморозков на улицах меньше не стало.
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