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Просто смешные анекдоты
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Дате | Рейтингу
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Георгий
2019-09-10- Купила себе трусы, а мужу рубашку, ценники поменяла местами. Муж расстроился, говорит дорогую рубашку купила.
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- А почему у вас дети седые?
- А я им на ночь вместо сказок правду о жизни рассказываю… allanecdots.ru
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Бедные кролики считали это любовью, а на самом деле люди их просто разводили…
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Пассажир говорит дежурному по станции:
- Поезд опаздывает уже на полчаса! allanecdots.ru
- Не волнуйтесь, ваш билет действителен трое суток…
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Лайфхак:
Летом можно ударить любого человека под предлогом того, что на нем сидит комар. allanecdots.ru
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Как стать плохим человеком. Инструкция.
1. Дать денег взаймы. allanecdots.ru
2. Долго ждать.
3. Спросить, когда отдадут.
Готово, вы - плохой человек!
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Квартирная хозяйка спрашивает у своей квартирантки-студентки:
- Что это твой брат к тебе больше не заходит? allanecdots.ru
- Да этот гад нашел себе новую сестру.
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Хочется сходить с девушкой в Москве на романтический ужин.
Посоветуйте хорошую девушку в Москве. allanecdots.ru
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Как объяснить человеку, что для него будет лучше, если ты съешь его ватрушку с творогом?
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Жена на напольных весах:
– Ой, какая я маленькая! allanecdots.ru
Муж:
– Ты хочешь сказать – толстенькая?
– Вовсе нет, именно маленькая. По стандартам женщина с моим весом должна быть на 20 сантиметров выше.
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– Милый, у меня так замёрзли руки…
– Какое удачное совпадение! У меня, как раз, полная раковина немытой посуды! allanecdots.ru
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