Просто смешные анекдоты

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PopРазные 2020-06-29

- Грешна я, батюшка.
- Знаю. allanecdots.ru
- Меня все упрекают в беспорядочных связях, а у меня ведь все-все в книге записано: кто, когда, сколько.
- Ты опять пришла меня шантажировать?

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БезгонорарныйРазные 2020-06-28

– Секрет богатства состоит в том, чтобы легко расставаться с деньгами.
– Господи, да я с ними и встретиться никак не могу. allanecdots.ru

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

Сегодня утром передо мной шел чувак, который открыл Киндер сюрприз, съел шоколад и...выкинул яйцо с игрушкой не открыв! ВЫКИНУЛ ИГРУШКУ!!! Меня до сих пор трясет...
Алена, 38 лет allanecdots.ru

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

- Если Вы поцелуете меня ещё раз, я буду Ваша навеки!
- Спасибо за предупреждение. allanecdots.ru

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

А помните, как в детском саду: нарисуешь маме на 8 Марта "каляку-маляку" - и она так радуется! Почему-то с женой этот фокус не проходит.

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

В парикмахерской мастер заканчивает мужскую стрижку. Казалось бы, осталось нанести последний штрих, подбривает кант, отодвигает немного воротничок рубашки, а у мужика на шее густо растут волосы. Парикмахер их подбривает и еще сильнее отодвигает воротничок...
Мужик со вздохом: allanecdots.ru
- Господи, да не старайтесь так, они у меня там до самой жопы.

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

Сегодня искренне радовалась тому, что в нашем городе не везде асфальт, когда уронила новый телефон в грязь...

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ГеоргийРазные 2020-06-26

- Приготовь мне пожрать!
- Будь романтичнее. allanecdots.ru
- Приготовь мне пожрать под дождем.

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Разные 2020-06-26

- Дедушка, я смотрю, ты все время читаешь только книги, а вот с газетой я тебя никогда не видел.
- Понимаешь внучек, все просто. Книги делают человека умным, а газеты - нервным. allanecdots.ru

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Разные 2020-06-26

Неспособность наслаждаться всеми прелестями одиночества подталкивает нас на ущербные отношения со всякими дебилами.

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Разные 2020-06-26

Раньше я любил лето, но потом понял, что лето может быть в любое время года, были бы деньги... Теперь я люблю деньги.

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