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Добрый
2022-09-07Не волнуйтесь, какое бы ни было у вас здоровье - его хватит до конца вашей жизни!
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Две современные бабульки у подъезда обсуждают прохожих:
- Гляди, Мань, вон идет парень и сам с собой разговаривает. Как думаешь, это конопля или Bluеtooth? allanecdots.ru
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Поспать или пойти на работу? Пойти на работу или поспать?
Пойду на работу и посплю allanecdots.ru
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Съели на ночь херсонский арбуз и узнали почему город так называется.
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Испытатель телевизоров устроился ещё и испытателем диванов и теперь пашет на две ставки.
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Поймал мужик золотую рыбку, и говорит она ему человеческим голосом:
- Отпусти меня, пожалуйста, а я за это три твоих желания выполню! allanecdots.ru
Мужик подумал, и говорит:
- Первое: хочу, чтобы меня перестали беспокоить алкогольные галлюцинации. Второе… Оп-па, а куда же ты делась, золотая рыбка???
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Столько вокруг осведомлённых людей! Так и хочется иногда спросить - как у меня дела? Что у меня нового?
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- Этот Фима - редкая скотина, подлец и бабник. Самовлюблённый лжец и сволочь... Ну какая женщина тут устоит???
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Что такое политкорректность? Это когда косоглазие называют хорошо развитым периферийным зрением.
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Когда я говорю, что ничего не хочу, это значит: "То, что я хочу, вы не в состоянии мне предоставить, а то, что вы можете мне предложить, мне нах@й не нужно, поэтому отъ@битесь". Но я культурный человек, и вслух произношу только "Ничего не хочу".
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- У него что теперь, какая-то другая дамочка?
- Ага. Он месяц назад перевагинился. allanecdots.ru
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