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Просто смешные анекдоты
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Дате | Рейтингу
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2021-12-16
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- Слушай, а что у тебя квартирка такая тесная?
- Да обычная. Просто обои клеить очень люблю. allanecdots.ru
- И что?
- А старые отдирать - не люблю!
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- Доктор, мне нужно эффективное средство для похудения!
- Нет проблем. Я вам пропишу уголь. allanecdots.ru
- В порошках или в таблетках?
- В мешках. Вагоны будете разгружать!
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Люди, которые просыпаются в 7 утра, с хорошим настроением, как вы это делаете? Что вы употребляете?
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- Помнишь, ты мне советовал на зиму окна заклеить?
- И что, тепло было? allanecdots.ru
- Темно...
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Старая семейная традиция: пересраться за полчаса до выхода, а на празднике выглядеть, как семья года.
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Когда я слушаю русский шансон, то начинаю понимать, что тюрьма - это лучшее место на Земле, где сидят самые талантливые и образованные люди, крепко любящие своих мам.
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Социологи установили, что подняв с ковра нитку, которую не смог всосать пылесос, 85% мужчин бросают ее обратно, чтобы дать пылесосу еще один шанс.
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- Я пирожки с черникой люблю, у меня поэтому зрение 100%.
- А я с грибами - и у меня 150% зрение. allanecdots.ru
- Это как?
- Вижу даже то, чего нет.
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Один фермер пришел в гости к другому.
- А почему у тебя петух в штанах ходит? allanecdots.ru
- Да жена нечаянно вылила на него кипяток, вот ж@па и облезла, а чтобы он не мерз, пошили ему штанцы…
- Он что, до сих пор не оброс?
- Перья выросли, но так прикольно смотреть, как он одной лапой курицу держит, а другой штаны снимает!
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