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Gergt
2015-01-29- Могу вам порекомендовать замечательного адвоката. Его клиенту грозил электрический стул, но он добился значительного снижения...
- Наказания? allanecdots.ru
- Нет, напряжения.
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СМС: Катя, я хочу вернуться к тебе и детям. Открой балкон, тут холодно!
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- 1-го января пьяные русские моряки захватили 20 сомалийских пиратов и потребовали за них выкуп. Сомалийская общественность в шоке.
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Молодая жена сготовила для мужа, первый в своей жизни пирог.
- Дорогой, я хочу завтра приготовить другой пирог, как тебе нравится эта идея? Ну что же ты молчишь, скажи же мне! Ну скажи что-нибудь! Ну, подай хоть признаки жизни... allanecdots.ru
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Изобретён, наконец, вечный двигатель. Принцип его работы до безобразия прост: круглое деревянное колесо, внутри которого бегает Дункан Маклауд.
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Один прятель - другому:
- Ты чего такой худой? Ты же месяц в Турции был. Тебя что, там не кормили? allanecdots.ru
- Да понимаешь, плохая наследственность, ускоренный метаболизм, тоска по родине...
- Бухал?
- Да!
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Дама жалуется подруге:
- Хоть бы ради приличия предложил переспать! allanecdots.ru
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- Изя, вы любите ceкc втроем?
- Да, а шо? allanecdots.ru
- Так бегите скорее домой, может, еще успеете!
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- Адвокат сказал, что наше дело не стоит и выеденного яйца!
- И сколько же он запросил? allanecdots.ru
- 5000баксов.
- Он что, питается яйцами Фаберже?
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- Где вы работаете?
- Это государственная тайна! allanecdots.ru
- А что производите?
- Я же сказал, разглашению не подлежит!
- А много платят?
- Да гроши – пять рублей за гранату.
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Вчера была у него дома. Над кроватью весит каяк, все стенки обвешаны ружьями для подводной охоты. И что меня напрягает больше всего, он меня постоянно называет "рыбкой"
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