Просто смешные анекдоты

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

В ответ на просьбы юных читателей продолжить эпопею про Гарри Поттера, автор эпопеи Джоан Роулинг написала 8-ю и последнюю книгу "Гарри Поттер и гопники Бирюлево".

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Звонок на радио:
- Добрый день! allanecdots.ru
- Здравствуйте!
- Могли бы вы поставить песню "Искала" Земфиры?
- Из чего, простите, песню?

- Из чего, простите, песню? " data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/47489/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Спрашивает девица князя на пиру:
- А почему тебя называют "Ясно солнышко"? allanecdots.ru
Князь отвечает:
- Сейчас заканчиваем пир, удаляемся в палаты. Ясно, солнышко?

Князь отвечает:
- Сейчас заканчиваем пир, удаляемся в палаты. Ясно, солнышко? " data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/47487/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3">

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

- Вернулся из отпуска - и чувствую, что-то не так со мной... Пошел проверяться. Сходил к невропатологу - нервы в порядке. Сдал анализ крови - алкоголь в норме. Пошел в вендиспансер - венерических заболеваний нет... Ну полный облом! Как будто и не отдыхал!

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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2015-07-01

Двое в купе.
- Простите, куда вы едете? allanecdots.ru
- В Астрахань.
- А, если не секрет, что вас туда тянет?
- Электровоз.

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

- Девочка, ты отличница?
- Hет. allanecdots.ru
- Хоpошистка?
- Hет. Я yдовлетвоpительница.

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

Октябренок подходит к пионеру - важному таколму, серьезному. тот презрительно:
- Чего тебе мелочь? allanecdots.ru
- Скажите, а дедушка Ленин какал?
Пионер после минутного раздумья:
- Какал, конечно, но как-то честнее, добрее что ли...

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

- Повезло тебе, подруга, с мужем! Солидный весь такой, молчаливый.
- Четвёртый раз женат. Говорит, что всё уже успел сказать предыдущим жёнам. allanecdots.ru

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

Жена мужу:
- Мама приедет в 5 утра, 22 июня. allanecdots.ru
Муж (задумчиво):
- Почти, как в сорок первом...

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

– Трахнуть бы тебя хорошенько, чтоб знал!
– Бабуль, давай ты будешь говорить "стукнуть". allanecdots.ru

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Юрий НиколаевичРазные 2015-07-01

Идет Рабинович по лесу и видит НЛО, а рядом маленький зеленый инопланетянин.
Рабинович: allanecdots.ru
- Здгавствуйте, догогой пгедставитель внеземной цивилизации!
Инопланетянин:
- Ни фига себе, и здесь они!

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