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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2017-05-11 |
Женщина создана для того, чтобы мужик не сдох от счастья.
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-08 |
Муж купает ребёнка, кричит из ванной:
- Кать, он ест пену! allanecdots.ru
Через пару минут:
- Кать, она реально вкусная!
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-08 |
- Пацаны, спасайте! Срочно нужны деньги на пластическую операцию!
- Сережа, ну мы же тебе говорили: не женись, присмотрись!.. allanecdots.ru
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-06 |
Если ваше яйцо в утке, то это еще не значит, что вы бессмертный как Кащей. Возможно, вы просто упали с больничной койки...
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-06 |
- Вот мы недавно в горы поднялись, решили шашлык пожарить, а вот костер развести не смогли.
- Ну, наверное, высоко забрались, кислорода не хватало. allanecdots.ru
- Ты слышал, что умные люди говорят? Кислорода не хватало! А ты заладил - дрова нужны, дрова...
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-05 |
- Мам, а ты любишь босиком ходить?
- Да, люблю. allanecdots.ru
- Тогда я ушла в твоих тапках.
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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2017-05-05 |
- Придёшь ко мне на свадьбу?
- Да, почему бы и нет. allanecdots.ru
- Отлично, с женихом вопрос решён.
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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2017-05-05 |
Холостякам на заметку.
А вы слышали когда-нибудь о методе "сухой стирки"?
Это когда из корзины с грязной одеждой достается что-нибудь самое
чистое! allanecdots.ru
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Vaserman_Druz_Разные 2017-05-03 |
1. Вы подсаживаете в свою машину случайную попутчицу - красивую девицу, сигналившую у дороги. Девица внезапно падает в обморок. Вы везете ее в больницу. Это стресс.2. В больнице вам говорят, что она беременна и поздравляют с будущим отцовством.. Вы объясняете, что впервые увидели ее час назад, но она настаивает на том, что отец именно вы. Это большой стресс.3. Вы требуете взять анализ ДНК на отцовство. Его берут. Врач отзывает вас в сторону и сообщает, что вы не можете быть отцом, т. к. генетически бесплодны. Эта новость вызывает стресс, смешанный с облегчением.4. По дороге домой вы вспоминаете, что у вас трое детей...
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-03 |
Не доводите женщину до безразличия, она оттуда уже не возвращается.
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ReadyOnOffРазные 2017-05-02 |
- Деда, а почему говорят, что моряки ходят в море?
- Ну, всё верно, внучек! Это мы, пехота, ходим в кусты, а они - в море! allanecdots.ru
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