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2020-12-14- Почему менты предпочитают питаться фастфудом?
- Потому что это мусорная еда. allanecdots.ru
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- Когда человек ближе всего к совершенству?
- Тогда, когда заполняет резюме на работу. allanecdots.ru
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Девушка в гостях у своего парня.
- Я хочу кушать, а у тебя пустой холодильник. allanecdots.ru
- Ну, потерпи до утра.
- А утром что-то будет?
- А утром ты уйдешь домой.
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Мужчина скончался от неизвестного вируса, который побудил его сообщить жене, что она набрала в весе.
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- Света, а где ты нашла этого обеспеченного мужчину?
- Стояла тупо у магазина, смотрела. allanecdots.ru
- Ну и как ты его вычислила из толпы других?
- Надел маску на входе, вышел - выкинул.
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Что за выражение такое: "Ты вынесла мне весь мозг!"?
Так и скажи: "Дорогая, у меня не хватает аргументов, чтобы парировать твои блистательные доводы". allanecdots.ru
| Так и скажи: "Дорогая, у меня не хватает аргументов, чтобы парировать твои блистательные доводы"." data-url="https://allanecdots.ru/95152/" data-title="Разные" data-image="https://allanecdots.ru/smajlik.jpg" data-services="whatsapp,vkontakte,collections,facebook,odnoklassniki,moimir,gplus,twitter,lj,viber,telegram" data-limit="3"> | Комментировать |
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- Чем вы занимаетесь по жизни?
- В основном офигеваю от происходящего. allanecdots.ru
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Сегодня 28 мая, и мы поздравляем тех, кто делает для нас колбасу, сосиски, мясные продукты, соки, йогурты, картофельные чипсы, газированные напитки, кетчупы, продукты из курятины и другие вкусняшки, а также поздравляем всех остальных работников химической промышленности с их профессиональным праздником!
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Приехал ковбой к любовнице в город. Та испугалась, мол,
муж скоро придет.
- А я в окно, - говорит ковбой. allanecdots.ru
- Так высоко же!
- Ничего, у меня лошадь умная, она под окном стоит - меня прямо в седло поймает.
Ну, только они разделись - звонок в дверь. Ковбой хватает в охапку свою одежду и прыгает в окно. Женщина открывает
дверь, а там стоит лошадь и говорит:
- Вы понимаете, там дождь начался, так скажите моему
хозяину, что я его в подъезде подожду.
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