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Vaserman_Druz`
2015-02-17- Сегодня молодёжь испытывает всё больший страх перед браком.
- И правильно делает! Я до брака вообще не знал, что такое страх. allanecdots.ru
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- Представляешь, ученые изобрели новое супер-средство для оживления мертвых!
- Какое? allanecdots.ru
- Трупу делается внутримышечная инъекция, после чего с ним можно два часа разговаривать!
- Да ну?
- Правда! Только он при этом не отвечает...
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И молвил богатырь:
- Выходи, чудище поганое! allanecdots.ru
И ответило чудище поганое:
- Извините, но мне только через две остановки выходить.
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- Вам, молодой человек, недостает аккуратности. А ведь Вы уже не школьник. Между прочим, некоторые люди в вашем возрасте уже становятся отцами!
- Ну, и Вы говорите, что это я не аккуратный?! allanecdots.ru
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- Есть у нас на заводе такая примета: если бригадир кричит, что мы, опять не трактор собрали.
- А что тогда собрали? allanecdots.ru
- А вот что кричит, то и собрали.
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Молодая, симпатичная. Материально обеспечена. Имею два высших образования. Квартиру, машину! Никого не ищу, ничего не продаю, замуж не собираюсь! Просто хвастаюсь.
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- Слушай, ты же интеллигентный, воспитанный, образованный человек?
- Ясен хер! allanecdots.ru
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- Ты кто такой?
- Я Амур. Видишь ту девочку? Сейчас я выстрелю в твое сердце и ты влюбишься в неe. allanecdots.ru
- Но она же страшная!
- А я подлый Амур
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- О Боже, милый, я вижу зелененького человечка! Что же мне делать?
- Переходи дорогу! allanecdots.ru
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- Марина, я заболела, мне так плохо! Пожалей меня!
- Люся, ты такая жалкая! allanecdots.ru
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